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I'm pregnant...now what?!?


First of all... I am NOT pregnant again. Mom, you may take a deep breath now.

Pregnancy Henna... So Amazing!
I felt compelled to share some tips on how to navigate through this labyrinth as an empowered, INFORMED, new mother. Being a single mom from the very beginning left me to stumble through this process solo. In many cases, calling my friends to see what they did, confused me even more. I decided that it was up to ME to look into all of my options, and I made decisions based on what I learned.

*disclaimer. . .I am not a medical professional. I am in no way telling you what to do with your pregnancy. This is just my story. I will share some of what I chose to do, and urge you to do some research before you decide for yourself. .

Being pregnant does NOT automatically make you a patient, but the medical industry is set up to make you feel that way. When you are fully informed about your options, they become YOUR CHOICES. If you feel a little uneasy about some advice being given to you, chances are there is a good reason for it. There are no "wrong" choices. Just under-informed choices.

Informed Consent;
  • a patient agrees to a health intervention based on an understanding of it
  • the patient has multiple choices and is not compelled to choose a particular one
  • the consent includes giving permission
Please think about this for a moment. How often do you ask your doctor "Why?" - "Do I have any other choices?" -  "May I think about these choices before making a decision?" Etc. . . 
Now, hopefully you are able to have this type of open dialogue with your doctor. I know that mine spends much of our appointment discussing options with me, every time. But this is DEFINITELY not the norm.
As a pregnant mother, it is even MORE important for you to be fully informed  before making any decisions. After all, you are deciding for two now. 


Who will you choose for your provider?

If possible, it would be beneficial to make this decision BEFORE you get pregnant. It will reduce your stress levels, and as the Boy Scouts always say... "Be Prepared"
It is very important to feel comfortable with your provider, and to trust that they respect your right to informed consent. 
Typically, OBs are trained to "do", while midwives are trained to "wait". OBs have a set standard of how they expect your pregnancy and delivery should proceed, and should their standard not be met, they are eager to suggest interventions like pitocin, forceps, c-sections etc. When a mother doesnt know her options, it is VERY EASY for an OB to guide her in the direction of an intervention... which often start a domino effect, ending in a c-section. 
Midwives on the other hand, tend to allow nature to take its course, as long as things are progressing normally. There is room in the world for both types of providers, but in a healthy pregnancy... midwives are the way to go, IMO. If a problem should arise, the midwife knows when to involve the OB, if needed. 


I chose to find a midwife for my prenatal care, but I wanted to also see a doctor first, just to make sure everything was good with the pregnancy. (if I were to do this over, I would skip the doctor and go straight to my midwife)

Don't take my word for it. Ask some friends, do some internet searches, pick up a book... Just compile as much information as you can, until you feel comfortable and confident in your decision. 

After having my Lil' Monster, I feel like he stole my brain, so this blog will help me archive the plethora of birthy info I have gathered over the past 2 years. Hopefully, it will serve to guide you in the right direction. If you feel you have reached a dead end, don't just give up... TURN AROUND & KEEP GOING!


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