Skip to main content

I'm pregnant...now what?!?


First of all... I am NOT pregnant again. Mom, you may take a deep breath now.

Pregnancy Henna... So Amazing!
I felt compelled to share some tips on how to navigate through this labyrinth as an empowered, INFORMED, new mother. Being a single mom from the very beginning left me to stumble through this process solo. In many cases, calling my friends to see what they did, confused me even more. I decided that it was up to ME to look into all of my options, and I made decisions based on what I learned.

*disclaimer. . .I am not a medical professional. I am in no way telling you what to do with your pregnancy. This is just my story. I will share some of what I chose to do, and urge you to do some research before you decide for yourself. .

Being pregnant does NOT automatically make you a patient, but the medical industry is set up to make you feel that way. When you are fully informed about your options, they become YOUR CHOICES. If you feel a little uneasy about some advice being given to you, chances are there is a good reason for it. There are no "wrong" choices. Just under-informed choices.

Informed Consent;
  • a patient agrees to a health intervention based on an understanding of it
  • the patient has multiple choices and is not compelled to choose a particular one
  • the consent includes giving permission
Please think about this for a moment. How often do you ask your doctor "Why?" - "Do I have any other choices?" -  "May I think about these choices before making a decision?" Etc. . . 
Now, hopefully you are able to have this type of open dialogue with your doctor. I know that mine spends much of our appointment discussing options with me, every time. But this is DEFINITELY not the norm.
As a pregnant mother, it is even MORE important for you to be fully informed  before making any decisions. After all, you are deciding for two now. 


Who will you choose for your provider?

If possible, it would be beneficial to make this decision BEFORE you get pregnant. It will reduce your stress levels, and as the Boy Scouts always say... "Be Prepared"
It is very important to feel comfortable with your provider, and to trust that they respect your right to informed consent. 
Typically, OBs are trained to "do", while midwives are trained to "wait". OBs have a set standard of how they expect your pregnancy and delivery should proceed, and should their standard not be met, they are eager to suggest interventions like pitocin, forceps, c-sections etc. When a mother doesnt know her options, it is VERY EASY for an OB to guide her in the direction of an intervention... which often start a domino effect, ending in a c-section. 
Midwives on the other hand, tend to allow nature to take its course, as long as things are progressing normally. There is room in the world for both types of providers, but in a healthy pregnancy... midwives are the way to go, IMO. If a problem should arise, the midwife knows when to involve the OB, if needed. 


I chose to find a midwife for my prenatal care, but I wanted to also see a doctor first, just to make sure everything was good with the pregnancy. (if I were to do this over, I would skip the doctor and go straight to my midwife)

Don't take my word for it. Ask some friends, do some internet searches, pick up a book... Just compile as much information as you can, until you feel comfortable and confident in your decision. 

After having my Lil' Monster, I feel like he stole my brain, so this blog will help me archive the plethora of birthy info I have gathered over the past 2 years. Hopefully, it will serve to guide you in the right direction. If you feel you have reached a dead end, don't just give up... TURN AROUND & KEEP GOING!


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

"Green Pediatricians" . . . less common than the Yeti

My EDD was fast approaching, and I didn't have a pediatrician yet. After months and months of research, I made some pretty significant decisions during my pregnancy, and I was learning that they were not exactly falling into the "norm".  I decided that I would schedule appointments to interview pediatricians. I started calling my friends to see who they thought I should consider. OF COURSE every one of them suggested their own doctors. On one hand, I was so happy to hear that so many of my loved ones were happy with their choice in providers for their kiddos. . . On the other however, I was becoming more and more frustrated with the process.  The first few interviews I went to in person. I cyber stalked these docs, and they SEEMED to be aligned with my new found "crunchiness". 
DOC #1  She seemed to be a good candidate because she worked with the hospital where I was going to be giving birth. She was really nice at the beginning. That ended as soon as she real…

Cloth V.S. Disposable . . . It's not just about the environment

So here I was again, pregnant with my son and trying to wade through the virtual piles of research I had compiled on diaper options. You would think this would be a super easy decision . . . but I was a Crunchy mom-to-be in a world full of Cashmere and Silk. As a matter of fact, before I joined my Bradley Group, I only knew one person cloth diapering . . . and she is over 500 miles away. Thank you 'neighbor'. You know who you are, and you know I love ya!

This is what I knew
*Cloth is better for the environment - Less waste in the landfills *I really wanted to make cloth work, long before I found out I was pregnant *My son is worth all the hard work. 'Wait . . . how hard will it be?" *Baby butts wearing a cloth diaper are simply ADORABLE!




















This is what I was told
*"Cloth diapers smell so bad, even when they are just wet" *"It is so much easier to use disposables" *"You are such a hippie" *"You are braver than I am"  *"I could never do it…

To Cut Or Not To Cut. . . Is this really even a question?

Oh Boy . . .

I am well aware that circumcision is a topic that many are not comfortable thinking about, let alone discussing. I also know that when I was first looking into facts, actual facts, about the pros and cons . . . I found more personal opinions than anything else.

This all started for me when I found out I was pregnant, even before I knew I was having a boy. A friend of mine posted an episode of Penn & Teller's "Bulls***" on her Facebook page. It was a documentary on circumcision, and while it didn't make up my mind for me . . . it sure did raise some questions that I was determined to find the answers to.

 I hadn't even considered (gasp) not circumcising my child! After all, it is just what is done, right?

Before you watch this . . . please be warned that there is some harsh language and some of the scenes are very tough to watch. Penn & Teller: Circumcision is BULLSH*T (video found on YouTube)
So here is where my journey started. I asked friend…